January will mark four years since the day my husband proposed……without a ring. I am surprised by the overwhelming amount of people who are blown away by this statement. Yes. He proposed. Without a ring. And I said YES! Call me crazy, right?!
The explanation was simple. We were poor. Living in a one bedroom duplex the size of my mom’s living room and working at a bar, we could hardly buy the things we need. Much less any “extras”.
It just didn’t matter to me. I knew I loved Clay & that I wanted to spend the rest if my life with him. A ring didn’t make that, or my marriage vows any more true. A ring didn’t determine the amount of worth I was to my husband. And a RING wasn’t worth starting off our lives together living underneath debt, or developing spending habits that could destroy us later.
We went out, with the tips from the previous nights shift, to buy a ring. And so we did. From Walmart with the price totaling $498, for the set. And I have worn that ring with just as much pride & attachment as anyone else’s 10k piece of jewelry.
A wedding ring is just a symbol of a MARRIAGE. If you marriage is falling apart, than that ring basically becomes worthless. And besides who really cares about the clarity and the color of a freaking diamond. You aren’t going to be able to tell unless you pull out your special travel-sized diamond tools. If more people strived to have a valuable and irreplaceable marriage, and put less emphasis on the “ring” & other materialistic things, I’m convinced the divorce rate would take a slight drop.
I knew that my relationship with my husband was priceless and irreplaceable, so why should I be worried about a ring?
Is it because I just don’t want nice things or because I felt I didn’t deserve them? NO. I just knew what the smart and reasonable thing for us to do at that stage of lives was. We both did. And we didn’t want to wait until we were able to afford a nice ring, to start our lives together.
It’s just so sad how things operate in today’s world. Two people love each other, and they know that they want to be married. The girl is going crazy, wondering if he will ever pop the question. At the same time, the guy is freaking out because he’s under pressure to be able to purchase the $15k ring he knows his girlfriend covets. Although he wants to propose, he can’t afford that ring. So he waits. And the girl continues to pressure him about marriage and rings. HOW SCREWED UP IS THAT??!!!!
I am so glad, that I never made my husband think I needed anything, other than his commitment, to make me love him. I am so glad he didn’t wait to ask. He promised me that one day, when he could, he would get me the ring he always thought I deserved.
Today was that day. Nearly four years later my husband gave me a ring that I couldn’t have even dreamed about before. The ring I would have never let him give to me 4 years ago.
These rings will never completely replace my first set. Instead, they will not only be worn as a symbol of commitment to my husband & my children, but also as a reminder of where we came from. Together, we have come so far & grown so much. It will be a way for the rest of the world to see how much my husband loves me, or at least see our love measured in society’s standards. Because we waited until it was feasible, we can feel nothing but joy having purchased these rings.
More than anything they are a reminder of just how lucky I am to have snagged such an amazing man. A man who’s happiness is obtained by mine. A man who would sacrifice anything in the world for me. Just because we couldn’t afford a nice ring back then, didn’t mean he didn’t want me to have the nicest things in the world. It didn’t mean he though I didn’t deserve them.
So, as astonishingly beautiful & and breathtaking as it is, as shocked as I was to receive it, and as proud as I am to display it on my finger; it could never take the place of my most valued possession……… My husband. The only thing I’ll ever need. The man who really is responsible for my happiness.
****in no way is this to be taken as me not liking or wanting the ring…… Because it’s absolutely amazing & and I’m still kinda freaking out about it!!!! Lol :)*****